Celebrity Affairs

Howdy y'all? How ya like ma straw topper? Ah got it at the two for one store. I learned how to walk like mommy dearest. Right foot then left foot. Mommy must be proud of them apples. Hillary Duff sports her massive forehead with a big proud smile. It's a blonde redneck Y'all! Do ya dig ma chains? Which are weirdly placed on her right boob. Bright orange nail polish completes the redneck look she's so naturally sporting. No pictures! Prince was channeling Ja Ja Gabore here. No pictures are her famously spoken words. Jessica: I hope he doesn't think I'm stupid. Nick never let me here the end of it. Especially after that whole tuna disaster. John: Don't ya worry yur sweet little dumb ass girl! I love you no matter what they say. Is it a man or a women? Mr. or Mrs. Beckham? I bet ya have to look twice. There goes the bright orange nail polish again. Please don't tell me that color is in. Her boyish bod needs a feminine color. Perhaps a pearly pink rose. What in the world? Ellen gives another ridiculous gift to J.Lo. The other gift was a hat that held a Colt 45 and a bottle of Crystal. Can ya guess who like The Colt 45? Ha. What happened to my Josh? Josh Hartnett is not wearing that hat. Nope. It's my eyes playing tricks on me. Really. The glasses... an illusion as well. He's too hot for that sorta stuff. Perhaps he is in disguise. Jay-Z